No…no that mood.  I typically take awhile to get into the mood for Christmas…into the Christmas spirit. I blame the retailers since they keep pushing the date back further and further (soon they will start before Halloween). And Christmas always seems to get here too fast…it sneaks up on me and I’m not ready.

But this year is different! I am turning over a new leaf. We put our tree up on the last day of November and I am already in full Christmas music mode. No bah-humbug for me this year. I am in the mood already. And I am ready for all of it: the lights, the carols, the food, the family, the parties, the gifts…and of course, the real reason for the season…celebrating the best gift of all!!

So here ya go…

I have started a new class for school and it is one I have been looking forward to for some tie now: Spiritual Formation. The class has kept me busy (you may have noticed the slow down in posts this past week), but it’s a good kind of busy as we talk about, learn about, and experience walking with Christ in our daily lives. It has been a challenge to my personal walk and an opportunity for growth.

This past week we’ve been talking about many topics (i.e.: God’s grace, the journey, struggles and trials, et al). But today a question that Jesus asked His own disciples has embedded itself in my spirit:

“But who do you say I am?”
Matthew 16:15, NLT

Paul immediately speaks up for the group and gives a great answer: “You are the Messiah, the Son of the living God” and Jesus praises him for His answer. It’s a great passage, a great story, with a great message. But that wasn’t what stuck with me. Jesus wasn’t just asking His disciples this question. He’s asking me and He’s asking you this very same question: But who do you say I am?”

How about it? Who do we say Jesus is? What does my life say about Jesus? Do I speak Jesus at all? Do others know about Jesus though my life? And if so…what am I saying about Jesus?

And what do I really believe about Jesus? Who do I say and who do I think Jesus is? Who is Jesus to me?

My Redeemer. My Lord. My Savior. My Friend.

How about you? Who do you say Jesus is? Let’s hear it…

My devotions this morning stretched me…it even hurt a little. I even struggled a little bit about writing a post about it, but then I remembered that this is the main point of the blog in the first place: to share my spiritual journey (the good, the bad, and the ugly). And it’s my fault anyway. I’ve been asking God to poke and prod and help me grow…He just gave me what I asked for.

The topic this time around? Faith.

It started with my devotional book reading discussing the topic of faith and our belief in God’s abilities and willingness to work in our lives (I warn you…this stuff is toe stepping material):

“We can believe that God might meet our need without any understanding of whether He wants to. And our suspicion of Him at this point is often the flaw in our belief.

“We know God can do great things on our behalf; we seldom believe that He will.

“We often tacitly acknowledge God’s omnipotence, His ability to intervene in our lives, even in very specific ways. But this is only half of faith. It has nothing to do with our experiences as long as it remains only a theological proposition. The other half of faith is understanding the mercy of God and His great willingness to intervene. This is what brings His glory from the realm of theology into the practicum of our lives. You want mercy and power? Expect mercy and power. And it will be done to you.” 
(At His Feet, page 300)

G-U-I-L-T-Y-!

I have long struggled with my lack of faith. I want to have faith…and I certainly believe that God CAN do some amazing things. What God exposed within my spirit this morning is that I don’t usually think God will, because I don’t trust His heart. I don’t trust God’s motive.

I know that sounds crazy..and it is a little bit. I know where it comes from, but my childhood is only an excuse. God wants to heal this within my spirit. He wants to free me from this lack of faith (or half-faith?). I desperately want to see the miraculous and the supernatural (not just for it’s own sake but to see God revealed and working as a result of my faith).

I do know that I’m not alone here. Even if others today don’t admit to this ailment I know that Jesus saw it plenty of time sin His ministry. He was constantly chastising people, including His disciples, for their lack of faith. And as long as they didn’t walk away from Jesus He was more than willing to help their lack of faith. If they showed an interest in growing and changing then He was there to help.

After my reading and prayer time this morning…after God had done some of His work on me…I felt a lot like the man in Mark 9:14-29 who has brought his demon-possessed son to Jesus for healing (after the disciples couldn’t to it because of their…well, you know):

“How long has this been happening?” Jesus asked the boy’s father.
He replied, “Since he was a little boy. The spirit often throws him into the fire or into water, trying to kill him. Have mercy on us and help us, if you can.”
“What do you mean, ‘If I can’?” Jesus asked. “Anything is possible if a person believes.”
The father instantly cried out, “I do believe, but help me overcome my unbelief!”

It’s that last line that has stuck with me all day (and that God is using it to change my heart and spirit on this topic):

I do believe — in God’s ability and power to do great and wonderful things

…but help me overcome my unbelief! — In God’s heart and motives…His willingness to work in my life.

I think many Christians suffer this particular malady, but God is working on me so that’s my focus right now. I am praying ans asking him to change my heart and restore my faith to fullness. Faith in God’s ability and faith in God’s heart. I’m a work in progress…

Jesus has come home. He has made a stop with His disciples in His home town…His old stomping grounds. He is among the people that now Him best. He is teaching. He is healing.

And they don’t buy it…

Where did he get all this wisdom and the power to perform such miracles?
He’s just a carpenter…They were deeply offended and refused to believe in him.
Mark 6:2-3, NLT

Ouch…sometimes it hurts to go home again. But there was more going on here than just a bunch of “homers” that didn’t believe in Jesus. Their lack of faith had a profound affect…one that we would do well to consider carefully…

And because of their unbelief, he couldn’t do any miracles
among them except to place his hands on a few sick people
and heal them. And he was amazed at their unbelief.
Mark 6:5-6, NLT

Wow…because of their lack of faith, Jesus was unable to perform miracles among them. Their unbelief had the power to limit Jesus’ power. Now, of course, Jesus still had the power to perform miracles (He does so later in this same chapter). But their unbelief limited the power and affect of Jesus in themselves.

How about you and me? Do we limit the affect and power of Christ in our own lives because of our unbelief? Our lack of faith? Have we limited what God wants to (and can) do in our lives because we just don’t have enough faith?

Is God amazed at our unbelief? Is Jesus amazed at your unbelief? I wonder…

This morning God led me back to a passage He had me in almost a month ago (told you I was a slow learner): John 15:9-17. Then it was about “remaining in His love”. Today was a slight variation on that theme (although they are related).

First, Jesus starts off with this:

When you obey my commandments,you remain in my love,
just as I obey my Father’s commandments and remain in his love.
John 15:10, NLT

You are my friends if you do what I command.
John 15:14, NLT

I don’t know about you, but two things came to mind here when I read this:

1. Yuck…I hate commands. I hate being told what to do (my authority issues)
2. OK, now that my tantrum is over…what exactly is Jesus commanding anyway?

The first reaction is of course not so good…but it blows by quickly. The second however is important. What is Jesus’ command for us? If we are supposed to follow His commandments, if we are supposed to do what He commands…what is it? (And of course we always think it’s going to be hard and no fun).

Jesus gives us the answer in this very same passage…twice (and it’s still easy to miss)…

This is my commandment: Love each other in the same way I have loved you.
John 15:12, NLT

This is my command: Love each other.
John 15:17, NLT

Doesn’t sound so bad right?

Or does it?

I’m off to give it try…

This topic of faith has come up several times this week. This morning was the real eye opener. I was reading Mark Chapter 5 when it came up. In the second part of the chapter a man named Jarius comes to Jesus because his daughter is sick. As was common, Jesus agrees to go to this man’s house and heal the little girl.

But something happens along the way. In this case, something good. A woman who needs healing reaches out and touches Jesus’ robe and is healed. Jesus feels it happen and stops to see who it was. He commends the woman for her faith and tells her that her suffering if over. Great story. I’ve heard and read it many times. But usually something gets lost in the story…

While he was still speaking to her,
messengers arrived from the home of Jairus,
the leader of the synagogue.
They told him, “Your daughter is dead.
There’s no use troubling the Teacher now.”
Mark 5:35, NLT

Total downer! Jesus is in the middle of doing a good thing and they get the news that this man’s daughter (who Jesus was supposed to be healing) is dead. Now you and I can already imagine our reaction…can put ourselves in Jarius’ shoes for a minute. I gotta tell ya…I don’t think I’d have a very good reaction. And what do I expect Jesus to say? Some words of comfort maybe (that’s what we would say). Or maybe even the miraculous…something like, “No worries…I’ve got ya covered. She’ll be OK!” But that’s not what Jesus says. Here is his response:

But Jesus overheard them and said to Jairus,
“Don’t be afraid. Just have faith.” 
Mark 5:36, NLT

He has just been told that his daughter is dead and what is Jesus’ response? “Don’t be afraid. Just have faith.” Wow. Not what you’d expect (but Jesus rarely does the expected does He?). And that’s our message too. If Jarius is supposed to not be afraid and have faith in his situation, the worst imaginable, how about you and me? Of course, we know the answer…but doing it is far different than thinking about it. When tough times come, when bills are piling up, when our kids are acting like aliens, when life happens…Jesus’ response?

Don’t be afraid.
Just have faith.

To you who are willing to listen, I say, love your enemies!
Do good to those who hate you.
Bless those who curse you.
Pray for those who hurt you.
Luke 6:27-28, NLT

Now this is tough love! And it’s not fair. It’s backwards. Makes you wonder what Jesus was thinking sometimes doesn’t it? I mean come on…love your enemies? Do good to those who hate you? Pray for the people in your life that hurt you (and not just hurt you once, but that hurt you over and over again!)? He just can’t be serious!

Or can He?

And if He is serious…why? Why should we act this way? It certainly isn’t in our nature (pretty much the exact opposite is our nature). Why does Jesus command us to love like this? Two reasons…

One: He calls us to be different, and that often means taking the rougher road (the 4×4 road instead of the paved road). Loving those who already love us is the easy way, and according to Jesus it’s what everyone else is doing already:

If you love only those who love you, why should you get credit for that?
Even sinners love those who love them!
Luke 6:32,NLT

Two: Because loving those who we don’t want to love and loving those who hurt us is how God acts…and He wants us to act like our Father. He wants us to be like Him. Imagine that! I don’t know about you, but that’s what I strive for pretty much every day…to be like my Father.

Love your enemies…
Then…you will be acting as children of the Most High,
for He is kind to those who are unthankful and wicked.
You must be compassionate, just as your Father is compassionate.
Luke 6:35-36, NLT

Don’t miss who he’s talking about here. Who has he been kind to? “Those who are unthankful and wicked.” Hmmm…sounds a lot like a guy I know…I see him in the mirror every day! God has been (and still is) kind and compassionate to me. All He asks is that I return the favor to others.

Yes, it’s tough love. But is anything really worth doing ever easy?

This has been a crazy, busy week! This math class I started has consumed a lot of time and thought processes just to keep my head above water (but I’m determined not to drown). Work hasn’t been much easier this past week either with a major project of mine taking some serious hits…requiring even more thought processes and causing plenty of stress.

So blogging has taken a slight back-seat this week…but I haven’t gone anywhere! And in the midst of all this chaos, stress, and workload God has been very close. And I couldn’t be more thankful! I am learning (slowly) to turn to Him in these times instead of turning to my false idols…the things I used to turn to when things got rough.

And He has come through in spades! This morning He gave me gentle reminder of just how much He loves me and how much He has done for me already…

 Yet it was our weaknesses he carried; it was our sorrows that weighed him down.
   And we thought his troubles were a punishment from God,
a punishment for his own sins!
But he was pierced for our rebellion, crushed for our sins.
   He was beaten so we could be whole. He was whipped so we could be healed.
 All of us, like sheep, have strayed away. We have left God’s paths to follow our own.
   Yet the Lord laid on him the sins of us all.
Isaiah 53:4-6, NLT

What more can I say besides:

THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU!!

I think that says it.

This morning our pastor (Pastor Ray) preached on Genesis 22. In this well known story God tests Abraham’s faith by asking him to sacrifice his most precious treasure…his one and only son. I can’t even begin to imaging the sacrifice that God was demanding from Abraham. And what’s more, Abraham did it without a single question and no hesitation! Hebrews even highlights this amazing display of faith.

It was a great sermon with a great message (that you can listen to online): What is God asking us (me) to sacrifice? Is there anything in my life that’s more important than God? All great questions to ponder this week…but that’s not what this particular post is about.

This is a classic Old Testament story, but while I was listening and chewing on it this morning I noticed a few parallels between this story and one that occurred a couple of thousand years later…Jesus’ story. I can’t say that I’m the first to ever come up with them (I’m certain that’s not the case) and I’m not sure why I’ve never noticed them before. That aside, here are the similarities I noticed and thought I’d share (and I’d like your thoughts on this too…did I miss any?):

1. God asks Abraham to sacrifice is only son.
   God actually does sacrifice his one and only son.
2. Isaac carries the wood for the sacrifice on his back.
   Jesus carried the wood for His sacrifice too (the cross).
3. Isaac willingly laid his life on the line (he became the sacrifice).
   Jesus willingly gave His life for pay for our sins (He became our sacrifice).

Of course, there is one big difference in the two stories…Jesus actually went through with it and became our sacrifice while Isaac was spared and God provided a substitute sacrifice. Come to think of it, that’s the parallel with our story…Jesus became our substitute sacrifice! And thank God (everyday) that He did!